thunder and frightening

pardon my reference to the weather, but copenhagen is currently experiencing its first official thunderstorm to "celebrate" the end of summer. there is lightening like right next to my window, and let me tell you that the wetness on my chair is def not rain! it turns out that studying abroad for a mere three weeks thus far has brought me into contact with some of my biggest fears: flying, hospitals, thunder & lightening, raging metrosexuals, and euro-trash pop music. fortunately, i have learned to cope with most of these, but, as for the music in the "discos" here, i would rather be trapped in a small room with no ventilation with a french person than listen to it for more than five minutes.
so friday begins the first leg of euro-trip 2004. i head to oslo, norway with georgia and my aussie classmate, bromwen, right after our blasted language exam.. i plan to celebrate my assumed failure during the 8-hour bus-ride with my girls.. after three nights in oslo, i'm going to stockholm, sweden to see some cool sights, and by "sights," of course, i mean "swedish men" and the home of ikea. after a few days there, i'll eventually land in finland where i will be for a few more days.. georgia and i are the only kids going for the entire trip, but a few people will meet up with us along the way... we might also take the ferry to estonia if we have time while in finland, but we'll see.. my favorite part is how my mother worries that i might not have an adequate supply of q-tips here, yet when i tell her that i will be hosteling around scandinavia with somewhat strangers, she says, "what? oh, yeah. um, ok." who the hell knows?
i'm am still a little upset that kevin wasn't able to come today as expected... turns out that the "geniuses" at princeton do not offer a major that allows people to successfully foward mail, thus rendering kevin helpless to travel without his renewed passport... kev says that he will re-scedule another flight even though he will have to bend over and take it because it will cost so much more, but, in this case, it's worth the money because even more than everyone else, i have not seen kev in way too long... funny how my freshmen year of college my phone bills were $500 because kevin and i had to talk constantly to ensure each others' sanity, now when we want to talk, we shell out more money and hop on a plane.. wow- i have great friends...
things have been really well here lately... true to form, mr. smooth-talker from the other night never called, but i couldn't care less.. danish instruction ends wednesday (praise jebus!), and i can't wait to say "hej. hej" to danish forever... at least the danes here realize that their god-forsaken language sreves no real prupose outside of this country except to make other people grateful for their own language... turns out that danish is the third most difficult language in the world, third to 1. mandarin and 2. cantonese... dude, after this, i think i might learn to speak "gerbil" beacuse, statistically, it will be a hell of a lot easier..
hmm, this entry is slightly random seeing as how i have absolutely no circadian rhythm established as a result of arriving here.. for now, i am going to stress about studying danish, but not really study it... i like the way my danish book looks when it's closed because when i open it, it breaths fire, and i don't like it..
oh, and good news: the aussies and canadians in my class have decided that they will teach me their "langauges" if i teach them how to speak like a southern californian... lesson 1: incessintly talk about "the o.c.," your mustang or suv, and say the word "like" at least like twice per sentence :) turns out all you have to do be an "aussie" is adopt "land down under" as your official anthem and blame canada for everything.. sounds fun, eh?
alright, dudes.. i'm peace-outting not because i'm especially tired but because i fear that the lightening here may strike the roof of my house and consequently me... good night! peace.

safety nets

so, it is sunday afternoon and instead of studying for my danish language exam, i have decided to check my e-mail and eat: two of my favorite pastimes... i have also decided that people get scared when i post my true emotions about my experiences aborad, so for purposes of my blog, i will refrain my verbal outbursts pertaining to anything like my housemates' ignorance and potential homesickness...
so last night was rad.. my "german" (as benny is now called) "rang me" last night (no, that does not mean what you think it does, stop snickering), and we all went to egmont, which is a huge dorm way far away from my house... georgia and i met up a ton of people from language class and a few new peeps... turns out that one of the aussies here, david, has a raging crush (ok, you can snicker here), and last night he went public with it. to complicate things, a fellow ucsb'er, mike, has been hot for the same teacher, and he decided to make it public that night... now i know why the majority of my friends my whole life have been beer-drinking, mellow guys.. so this dorm party is infamous, happems once a year, and lasts for 72-hours straight.. last night was the final 12 hours of it, so people were getting crazy with the drinking, emotions, and european "dancing" (if that what they call semi-rhythmic spasms here, yikes!) mike and david spent the better part of the night trying to "out-flirt" one another for georgia; i felt like i was at a high school dance except my date wasn't gay and there were no chaperones. so i ended up hanging out with this guy named james all night who goes to the university of santa clara. i ditched the lets-go-smoke-in-the-bathroom-during-homeroom-and-giggle-about-the-cutetess-boy-in-gym-class-gossip for long enough to actually chill and meet some kick-ass italians; one named guido! so rad.. but he didn't have the pedophile/european mustache, so don't get to excited.. so james and i had some drinks while he told me about his adventures backpacking through euprope and how we ended up in copenhagen.. the night was awesome except for the random periods that georgia, drunk yet pretending not to be, would find me and seek counsel on who she should "choose." my answers was usually "wilbur," her stuffed-animal pig, but she wasn't having it... james was really cool except he was labeled a "good 'ol boy," meaniong that he went to an infamous rich high school where georgia said that all the kids there do is cocaine on the weekdays at their parents second house.. aside from that, i didn't pay for any of my drinks and the company was refreshing... he asked for my number which was cool, but i saw him giving his away like candy to other women, so i'm not about to lose sleep over this guy :) guido, teresa, and the rest of the italians scored some hash from christianshavn (the crazy hippy commune here), so we smoked it in a dorm kitchen and watched our aussie friends sing "land down under" by 'men at work'; it was priceless... by the time we got out of there, the sun had already risen, so we headed home...
it was only 9:00 in cali, so i called my mom to shoot the shit... i always cry during and after conversatiosn with my family because i feel so bad for all of us, and, me, being, so far way, doesn't make me feel like i am "there" for them like i should be.. my mom doesn't sound too well now living on her own, and i haven't even heard from my dad.. my 'lil bro said he spend his birthday listening to my parents verbally-antagonize each other.. you know it's bad when you feel like you have to worry about your parents, not yourself or your siblings... i would usually follow a sentence like that with "ya know?," but at this point, nobody would know except the very people in my family... my siters did say that they have began the passport application process, so hopefully they will be able to take a break from the real lives and enjoy copenhagen... i would say that the hardest part of living here is listening to everyone talk so happily to their parents everyday.. it is made even worse by the fact that not only do i have to work up the emotional sanity to dial my parents number seperately, but it takes me so long to recoup after discussing our lives with one another... it's just too much to deal with... it was so hard a couple months ago even when i had the support of all my s.b. friends; the people i could just skateboard over to talk to... adjusting to life in a new country is so easy compared to trying to cope with my family and not having the understanding and support of my friends and siblings like i used to...
alright, well i am making myself upset, which, as i have been told, is not good for a concussion, so i'm going to go study and write you all some postcards.. take care and i miss you all soooo much! xoxo- peace.

the dark side of enlightenment

so this makes two posts in one day- I am going to attribute such an occurrence to the misery that is the dark sky outside. I feel fine, don’t freak out, but I def have a ton of things on my mind. So the housemates decided to get into a discussion of art, money, and politics today. My god. Never have I felt such a rift between myself and people to whom, under these circumstances, I should undoubtedly able to relate. I have decided that I am one of the most unique people I know and have ever known. No person I know aside from myself experiences emotions and has thought processes on any level close to those of my own.

:: insert obligatory disclaimer here::

this does not imply, by any means, that the way I think and feel is in any way “superior” or “above” that of anyone else’s.

what I mean by the abovementioned statement is that I come from sets of circumstances already so esoteric and warped that simple human relations have become disappointing and discouragingly predictable. Take for example the people whom I live with or literally every international student I have met thus far: each one of their still-married parents went to college (with the majority holding higher degrees than a bachelor’s); come from dangerously-affluent backgrounds; have already traveled and/or studied abroad whether during high school or just “for fun”; and pretty much have no opinions or evidence to substantiate their regurgitated arguments aside from the analogies and examples employed by their professors during lectures.

these people are fucking ridiculous puppets.

after dinner kurt decides to start talking about politics and voting. Great topic, but he’s a moron. I don’t know if I have ever been interrupted or verbally trampled-upon so many times in a single dialog, jesus fucking christ. After firing off obviously inaccurate statistics and supposed “facts” about voting trends and continuum of political identification, I manage to squander literally ten seconds of feedback; not even enough time to inform kurt that what he is saying is completely grounded in hearsay and speculation and that his argument is in no way supported by anything but his personal political preferences. Georgia enters the conversation, which diverts attention away from politics long enough to incorporate a discussion about how the study of art history is absolutely vital to not only the enlightenment of third world peoples, but, most importantly, to the promotion and maintenance of “high culture.” kurt whole-heartedly nods in concurrence, failing to realize that in his previous rant, he made pangs to argue that the “democracy, in its purest form,” will never be realized as long as the rich control everyone else and maintain themselves as the “status quo.” Ignorant bastard. To top things off, he continuously harkens back to the benefits of studying at one of the “most diverse institutions of higher learning in the world: the u.c. system,” and proceeds to give me crap about my aspiration to study at a small, private college for grad school. hey, kurt: remember what you always talk about? Oh, yeah: how both your parents and most of your relatives went to yale and are now rich bastards whose connections could send you there, too? remember?

way to “take a stance” against the system. so you were admitted to a college based solely on your academic and personal merits? Fuck you: you run track, so the “prestigious” uc system pays you to throw a fucking steel ball so “cal” can retain its zeal as an “all-around” successful school.

the people here come from such spoiled backgrounds yet claim to be so “special” because they verbally rebel against the exact system that has given (and continues to give) them everything they will ever need: endless lines of family influence, money, and ignorance. kurt insists that he has come to prefer a “minimalist” approach to life. He explains to me the process of “embodying” this philosophy: he decided that he didn’t need nine guitars (just two) and that he didn’t need an i-pod with five gigs of memory, he can live with fewer. thank god, right? he has also decided to only budget himself ten dollars for every meal he eats here, so he’s only going to ask his parents for a ten thousand dollar budget for this trip.

i am sickened past the point of physical nauseation.

then there’s georgia who does the same thing as kurt; tries to establish herself as “apart” and “above” the elitist lifestyle that has given her a warped sense of “need” and “privilege.” Good thing all she does is talk about how happy her parents are after more than twenty-five years of marriage and how great it is that her parents weren’t (gasp!) “too young” too have kids… thank god they were able to avoid raising a self-centered, narrow-minded child by waiting to have children. Heaven forbid you actually raise a child in a realistic, non-nuclear environment. Same goes with ben; the future president of our nation; a man who will pass the torch of selfishness to future generations; teaching them the “right” way to do things like raise children, who should go to what schools, what they should study, and what everyone else should and should not do to insure that such philosophies tirelessly repeat themselves.

i hate these people. I hate what they say, what they stand for, what they stand against. I hate their absolutism. Heaven forbid someone outside of their circumstances at the onset actually end up by their side somewhere down the road. And heaven forbid if that person actually point out the fallacies and inaccuracies of the foundation atop which you so assuredly stand.

the worst part of this whole mess is what is to come of me. I venture to say “people like me,” but I have yet to meet anyone who so closely approximates that title. Do I go to “their” schools, play by “their” rules in order to one-day fully-infiltrate and subvert the system?

impossible.

that would require knowing more than one person who can peer into such a system without being engulfed by its lure. That would require knowing another person raised with decency outside that system who has experienced the tragedy of wanting to enlighten themselves but only being able to do so within the suffocated grip of education. I am left to wonder if education (or “enlightenment”) leads to elitism, which leads to arrogance, which leads to selfishness, which leads to selflessness, resulting in the birth of children who will blindly adopt the morbid ideologies of their still-morbid parents.

now museum, now you don't

so i have reachedthe mandatory phase in my stay here in lovely denmark where i don't like it here; but do not confuse this for the mandatory "homesick" phase... i am simply, as blair would say, "annoyed as all get out" with everything here... people here cannot give directions to save their lives. i had an appointment with my uc study center advisor (the same woman who accompanied me to the hospital during my little "trip" to bornholm)... so the metro people are being lame and actually checking tickets, so i skee-daddle out the door just in time to realize that i have no idea what metro station i am in.. after cruising the streets for a bit, i consult a kiosk, which looks like something out of a dr. suess book, and decide that this damned country is forcing me to mingle with danes who hate my country. sigh. so after asking two people (not even people who look blind, slow, or entirely danish) i am given back-to-back obviously wrong directions. not only do i miss my appointment (and come home to receive a frantic e-mail from my advisor wondering why i didn't show and if i were back in the hospital), i damn near got hit by a car who couldn't see that i had the right-of-way... sigh. to top things off, this country does not have ice. yeah, ice.. my house doesn't have a freezer and come to find out, that is normal here. when you go to any restaurant or cafe, you have to pay not only for the glass of water, but people look at you like just shot them when you actually, gasp!, ask for ice... i asked for an iced latte (for which i paid $9.00!!) and received espresso in a mug with luke-warm half and half... then some chick in my class decided to talk 'ish on the star-bizzles.. wrong move, mister sister.. so annoying. not only that, but there is a serious shortage of semi-attractive men in this city... you know it's bad when you see some guy who looks like a down-syndromed version of carrot top and you catch yourself wondering what he is doing after his shift at the grocery store. the only reasons why i want it to rain here is so that half the people here will receive a "shower" of sorts, and that man capris will slowly fade from public view...
but i am not bitter, just frustrated... it seems that the majority of people who i encounter have already studied abroad and already know what to do in new situations. sigh. i guess it is good that i am with people like that, in a way, because they are really helpful about, oh, don't know, how strong the euro is right now... but some peeps here found this kick-arse museum so we went to it today.. my trip there was made even better when i found out that all museums are free on wednesday and i found 10 kroner on the ground so i didn't have to pay for a locker... the museum was tight... lots of art snobs there, though; sitting around asking each other questions about some painting from antiquity, convinced that the way to interpret art is to ask yes or no questions and tell other that they are incorrect in what they see.
tonight should be good times... the student cafe here sponsors "international night" for all the forgein alcoholics, so we are going to go check it out.. my hot german classmate called me yesterday to inquire about the homework and asked me what i was doing last night and if i were going to international night tonight. sigh. too bad he has a girlfriend. oh, yeah: and a child. for htose of you interested in sending me anything, please send ice, zip-lock bags, and fidelity. that'd be great ;) take care, all! and my entries should start to sound more coherent as the days progress.. it seems that my mental abilities increase as the swelling and bruising of my nose decrease... and kev is coming in 6 days! i am so excited that i think i may have just peed a little, so i gotta go. peace...

nose to the grindstone

so i went to the danish island of bornholm this weekend. bornholm is a tiny island fought over by sweden and denmark many years back, and when given the option to be part of either country, they chose denmark. so all the uc kids took a bus to sweden and a boat to bornholm on saturday morning.. our first stop was at a really old castle, which was rad... some stupid ass girl from davis tried to climb into part of the castle that was "off limits" and ended up getting her fat ass stuck in a hole... it was so amusing that i stepped to the side and proceeded to take picture of her attempting to squirm and scream her ass out of the opening. classic. if she wasn't such an attention-deprived idiot, i would have offered to help, but she isn't so i didn't. turns out that karma is a bitch, however. you see, most of the kids on this trip don't attend ucsb, meaning that the sight of alcohol makes them as giddy as me in a room full of cake. so after checking into our hostel, all the uc kids and i sat down for a gourmet dinner complete with unlimited wine and food. o at the end of the meal, everyone was fairly chummy (read: wasted), and when the wine ran dry, they headed for the nearest liquor store. needless to say, everyone was tanked and running around the island in true ucsb fashion. unfortunately such behavior quickly got annoying so my housemates and i decided to just sit on a cliff overlooking the baltic and chill... all was going well until someone asked me to run back to the hostel real quick to relay a message to georgia. nto even being that many "sheets to the wind," i said sure and proceeded to run. yeah, i said run, ya know, as in a physcial activity i usually will not perform, but what happens in bornhom stays in bornholm, right? so i'm an asshole, and i clipped to side of a stone wall in my attempt to turn...
face plant. onto my nose. knocked unconscious.
so i wak e up in a bathroom with blood absolutely everywhere. i was apparently in-and-out of consciouness until i got to the hospital. as soon as i woke up at the hospital, i became hysterical because, for those of you who know anything about me, hospitals and emily do not mix.. i was so hysterical that i kept passing out... not cool. i spent the night in the hospital and i couldn't open my eyes because my face was so swollen.. i checked out of the hospital in the afternoon just as the swelling started up recede. my nose is still ripped open, bruised, and swollen, but all my teeth are intacted, thank god. i have a concussion and the room is spinning slightly as i write this, so i am disobeying doctor's orders instructing me not to type, read, etc. i was, however, adviced not to go to school and sleep all day, so cha-ching! i am fine, though, and for those of you reading this, do not tell my mom about this little "incident" because she will be on the first flight here if she knows. you will notice the lack of humor in this "blog," but my head is still slightly out of commission. i will return with some more interesting and optimistic antecdotes just as soon as the room stops spinning and the color-spots disappear. i love and miss you all, and remember, the opening paragraph of this entry. i know we all miss each other, i know that :) peace...

i'm not danish, i'm californian

hi-duh-lee, ho-duh-lee, neglecterinos! well, well, well, what to write about. well, the rain has come. at first i was startled at the sight of water falling from the sky, which had mysteriously turned grey during this morning's class. upon inquisition, my european and non-californian friends informed me that these blasted "drops" of "rain" will likely make their presence known during my stay here in supposedly "wonderful" (read: gloomy) copenhagen... i am convinced that satan just made a mistake, and he will soon return the clouds and their subsequent rain to the depths of hell (read: places where it rains all the time).
on a lighter note, the international students from georgia and me's class decided to grab a drink at the student cafe after taking a canal tour around copenhagen. you show your student i.d., a glass of beer is pretty cheap, which probably explains why people here opt to continue their education for as long as possible. afterward, all ten of us ate at a sketchy chinese restaurant where everything from the water to the toilet money... for those of us who peed, we didn't wash our hands, and then paid the toliet guy... suckas. afterward, we went to the harbor here, grab some more beers, and plopped ourselves down along the water where half the city of copenhagen was hanging out... people here are absoultely obsessed with talking about the weather.. you would think you would only talk about something if it were interesting or cool... crazy danes... so after fending off quesitons about "how nice it is outside" and "aren't you glad the sun's out," we decided to peace out and actually get some sleep before our last class of the week. class was rad.. the hot german wasn't there; hmm, the baby must have needed a sitter. the gang and i decided throw a party at our house tonight, so we invited everyone from like every continent to partake.. i really hope the antarticans come ;) on the metro some guy asked me if i were danish, and in all seriousness i said "no, i'm californain." everyone started laughing, but i literally don't get why it's funny. people also don't get why i have decided that i will not support christianhavn (the hippy commune) because they are hypoctrics; they crave autonomy fromthe very system they require revenue and derive legitimacy. don't even get me started on pechanga....
and i still refuse to pay for the metro becuase everything else is so effing expensive in this city that the least they could do is let us get to where we need to go to pay too much without having to pay too much to get there, right? we think the metro police are on to us, so everytime they get on our car to check our tickets (or, in our case, lack thereof), we just get off and get on another car.. something tells me that i will have to call someone to bike down to the metro jail and bail my immoral ass out..
got a rather disturbing e-mail from my mom; turns out that she is setting up shop across town somewhere because of the divorce. it has been a good stress reliever of sorts to be so far away, but it actually makes me worry more in the long-run about what will happen to my family.. sometimes it seems so easy to just completely distance myself from them for periods of time longer than some would excuse... it's weird, too, because no one has called or really contacted me from i.v... i think of them a lot, but have heard from none of them... everyone keeps bracing themselves for the obligatory bout of homesickness that sets in supposedly after the first month here, but i wonder if you miss what you don't truly feel misses you... and, no, it's not the rain talking... apparently no one gets depressed here, just psychotic, because the days are like three hours short here during late fall and early winter... that may explain the loony-bin hospital across the street from my house. :: cue the dramatic music, thunder, and lightning ::
danish class is still way hard, but i am trying my damn hardest... whenever i am done with my lessons, i just speak spanish to the spaniards next to me, marco and jesus... hmm, i found jesus. that was easy.. i'll cross that one off my list of things to do. alright, well, i think i will pack seeing as how i leave for bornholm tomorrow morning... i have a potential trip to lund and stockholm, sweden at the end of the month because some of the sb peeps are arriving there soon, so hopefully it will work itself out... my 'lil bro's b-day is coming up, so i think i will start looking for a gift.. something tells me that this country is so liberal that it shouldn't be hard to find something to placate a fifteen-year-old boy.. hmm, maybe i should go to amsterdam :) ok, take care all- miss you mucho grande! peace...

married, with children

so turns out the mr. hot german. has a girlfriend. did i also mention that he has a child? after stuttering and gracefully bowing out of our conversation and overt flirting, my housemate kurt informed me that, in his travels and recent talks with people here, "marriage" is more of a social lable, and it doesn't carry the weight and significance here as in the states.. regardless, i am from the states and i refuse to be called the "other women," even though my housemates already call me that... hmm, i'mnot really into being a mistress/step-mom, so i'll just say "peace out" to that guy :) all is well here, aside from that... the ucsb people planned a party for last night and we invited all the international kids.. turns out the things we have in common all revolve around alcohol, good-looking people, and exploring new cities.. sound good to me :) all the international students are becoming really close (prb bc if we don't cling to each other we will end up crying alone in our rooms for the rest of the semester), but, nonetheless, we are all def bonding already.. thank god that my roomies are from california (even though some are nor cal)- just having other californians (not americans) reminds me of home, which is comforting.. it also reminds me that california is the shit, even though our governor is dumber than a bucket of hair, and that people are hurried, rude, and stupid.
there is a cafe right next to my university faculty that is specially-made for international students, and wednesdays are bar nights for us. the roomie kurt might become a bartender there, so all i have to say is that emily will be drinking jameson sours for freezie for the rest of her time here... thus far, i have yet to make a complete ass of myself, but rest assured i will not let anyone down... ok, i'm off to write more postcards and unload the shit ton of stuff i bought from h&m! viva la denmark! peace...

jeg hedder emily

sweet mary and jesus! so madatory language class started on monday, meaning that my mornings have been replaced with head-throbbingly difficult danish lessons... turns out that all international kids need to know "some" danish whilr they're here, so the peeps at copenhagen university decided to section us off and cram us into industrial classrooms every morning, five days a week for three and a half hours. beginning at nine in the morning. did i also mention that no english whatsoever is spoken by outr instructor. at all. hmm, how do you say um, kill me now, in danish? it's really intense to say the least.. thankfully gergia and i were rounded up and placed in the same class, so i have someone to sit there and be utterly confused with all morning. also rad is the metro system that the danes have got going over here: the tickets for it are on the "honor system," so needless to say that all the americans ride for free everyday ;)
things have been really busy here because not only have classes started, but i have met a ton of new international friends. georgis an di decided that we were going to tell people that we were from vancouver because you get too much crap for being from the u.s., but turns out that in doing that we met the coolest guy, brian, who is actually from canada! sweet, motherland! our class is eerily reminescent of high school because we pass notes and everyone has crushes on each other already. in my class we have people from austria, canada, austrailia, germany, estonia, canada, franch, england, spain, and china to mention a few- it is so fascinating... i love speaking espanol with the spanish guys, even moreso now that they believe that i, of all people, can :)
the uc people have planned a trip for all the uc kids to the island of bornholm off the coast of sweden, so that's happening this weekend and should be the shiz-nit... also, i tracked down all the kiddies from ucsb here,. and planned a killer party for tonight... it wasn't quite as easy as shooting out an address and telling people that it is on the "ocean side," but it's gonna be fun-ness... and, on a "swet ass sweet" note, my international crush (his name is benjamin and he is from berlin, germany), was studly, and after i invited him to the party tonight, he asked me for my phone number.. i knew getting a local number here would pay off! sch-wing! alright, well, i have had a long day of doing things that shouldn't make me tired, but i think that i'd like to nap... so much more i can say, but i will leave you with this: just be thankful that men don't wear "man capris" in the states. seriously, be thankful, it's the ugliest part of this country. peace :)

be cool, stay in school

holy crow! so more roomies arrived: a guy from berkeley named kurt... he's cool so far aside from the fact he is on the 5-year plan at cal. on a scholarship. for track. he showed up with his friends who are traveling europe, so we went to a club called "bombay," and partied.. it was really fun except some random ass (drunk) guy started giving me shit about the states and how americans have no purpose in life except to be arrogant... i wouldn't have cared except for the fact that he ended his little rant by telling me to get the fuck out of here before he kicks my ass... hmmm, peace out, asshole. clubs (discos) here don't close 'til like 5a.m. (some 10 a.m.!!), so we played 'til 3 a.m. and took the metro home... turns out that georgia isn't half bad... she's just one of those people who always says stupid stuff, but you can't entirely write her off because occasionally she does actually say something intelligent or insightful.. but as for ben, sweet god.. ok, his deal: 20. 4 majors at ucsd. yes, 4 (he worked out a deal with the school, he says). wants to be president. takes 36 units every quarter and says such a load is "fun." yet he and georgia are good friends... hmm... i can only stand to be around him for short intervals because my gag reflex can't handle it...
georgia, ban, and i decided to brave themetros, buses, and our own geographical confusion and go to ikea... good times. our homes are t-i-t tight now.. i was told not to hang around other americans in a forgein country because it will stunt your cultural growth, blah, blah, blah.. so i deveopled a system in which you can only ask other danes one question per hour... it worked for me but ben is a sopiled, confused soul to the extent he can't tie his own show without either asking you how to do it or for you to do it... needless to say, i was telling him to shut up for the better part of the day.. ikea was pimp, though.. seeing as how we are neighbors to its homeland, sweden, right now... for dinner we went to this kick-ass cafe just around the corner from my house called hadi's cafe... the owner (hadi) used to live in upland, which is right next door to rancho cucamonga where i grew up... he calls me "miss america" and insists that i get him a shirt that says "i love california." we got v.i.p. treatment there because he and elise (the girl in my house who has been here for 4 years) are good friends... dude, i would be so lost without elize, she translates for me and has been such a help with everything... we called her "hus mor" (hoos mo-wah) meaning "house mom" because she is like the wise elder of the dwelling...
tor is in norway 'til next week, so i suggested having a house dinner sometime to invite our mentors to eat and chill with us.. language class starts tomorrow.. danes are like "oh, the faculty is close to where you are." um, what? it's like an hour walk away, meaning at least 20 mins. through downtown copenhagen on bike... sweet christ.. they say americans are spoiled and that most danes will just ride their bike in the snow or rain, anyway.. yeah, um, no.. thismuch of myself will i admit is "american..." i have my trusty bike, but i'm also being whatmetros cruise past the place because emily does not ride her bike in falling water...
today i think i will go to a cafe (because most everything else is closed on sundays here), and then maybe take a nap outside- i am told to enjoy the sunshine because denmark never sees it: yikes! alright, take care, all! :)

the mad real world

so the new housemates are stupid and immature. damn. they arrived at like 2 in the morning and proceeded to videotape everything from the toilet to the windows here right away, probably to show their "friends" back in sd (read: grandparents and goldfish). wtf? after that they decided to literally ran around the house and were frighteningly amused with the winding staircase for the better part of a half hour. they are from ucsd (read: either religious or the type who really do believe that ucsd is one of the more "prestigious" uc's. right, guys? guys..). they go by ben and georgia, but their new names are "hey" and "shut up." they decided to call their mentors during the night, and then ran around the house screaming "party! party!" any uc kids in the house, there's a party!" ok, strike two. sweet christ. i opened my door to see ben (the "guy" of the duo) running around trying to write down the address and contain his excitement. dude, have you never been to a party that didn't pass out goodies bags at the end? ass... ok, i knew i had to stop this right now... i opened my door to find them in the kitchen, so i said "look, this isn't 'the real world' where you need to run around screaming and deciding which room you want. there are other people here, so if you two have to play right now, do it in the front yard." ben put his head down liked a shamed puppy and georgia (the "girl" and i use that term ever so loosely) was like "oh, um, ok." why she was surprised will forever escape me... so basically, i will be babysitting while i am here, too... i don't remember signing up to yell at people and possibly change diapers, so i think i will look over my lease once more.. on a lighter note, i met with my mentor yesterday afternoon and he is way rad.. we must have biked for at least 15 miles yesterday.. we went to two different islands via land bridges and mads attempted to show me parts of the university (spread all over denmark!) i also saw "christiana" which is like this old hippy community on the island of ama.. it's like a weird version of woodstock because they took over this army base in the late 70s and are fighting to stay there still.. mads told me that part of the base is called "pusherman's way," but the danish police cracked down, so they don't sell weed there anymore. damn.. guess i'll have to find some other hook-ups there ;) i also went to the royal castle and when mads and i parked our bikes to take a pic of a royal guard, another guard picked up his gun and told us to not park there in danish. apparently guns serve as universal translators because my kick-stand was up even before mads could tell me what was going down :) the queen is on holiday here, but should be back soon, so i am way excited! well, so much more i could say, but i'm going to do some more exploring today.
oh! i found a place to get a latte here! thank god... it sounds weird, but the espresso from the beezies tastes so much better! :) peace...

i'm in wonderful copenhagen!

at the urging of most everyone i know, i have decided to chroncile (publically) my adventures abroad. well, before i begin anything, i'll warn you of two things: i do not capitalize anything; and i am an absolute stickler for puncuation (if not grammar and spelling)... sweet. ok, here we go:

well, i arrived in denmark on monday, way too jet-lagged to even see straight after having spent eleven hours in coach crammed between a seemingly mute german man and an asian man so old he fell asleep repeatedly during his attempts to both eat and stand... needless to say, i am never flying coach or eating english airline food ever again... after spending an hour in heathrow and discovering that english people do, indeed, have awful teeth, i finally arrived in copenhagen. well, my "mentor" decided not to show so i shelled out 300 dkk (danish kroner) or about $60 for a ride to my house in a mercedes (read: taxi). turns out that denmark is as flat as my chest (both now and in 7th grade), and that people do not believe in coming out after a certain hour of night. this city looks like a museum; a place where i shouldn't be allowed to touch anything, but i am told that i totally can... turns out the man from whom i am subleasins is a gay norweigan with an affinity for tan men in speedos... good talk, i guess.. it is now thursday, and i am still the only kid in my house, or shoudl i say a fourth floor, narrow, loft-like apartment accessible only by a winding, creeking, wooden, staircase. pretty sweet i must say it is to have my own room; i ever bought a plant for it :) i am even more lame and culturally-inept because i only know two words of danish, so everything from grocery shopping to tripping over my own two feet requires more linguistic explanation than i am prepared for.. i did, however, manage to buy a bike and a cell phone today, so i was way proud of myself... the chick at the "dan talk" cell phone store talked politics with me for a solid hour. during that time, she "reminded" me that the reaosn for the attack on the twin towers was solely because of the "jews," and that americans are "in the dark" about the truth... i had to keep from laughing at her former statement, but my humor was short-lived as i realized that i was associated with the ignorance by virtue of my homeland. damn you, bush! but so much more detail i could go into about my adventures here... for the most part, people are helpful and friendly after you initiate conversation or say anything about american pop culture. it seems that anything we commodify, including small dogs and paris hilton, is eaten up abroad... funny, though, that everywhere i go i see the intial "LV" on bags and maroon 5 is playing somewhere; leaves me to wonder if we are all ignorant, despite our media and perceptions.. i tried to hang out with some guy from ucsb, but no dice... it seems that he views all glasses "half-full," and that's something that i'm not into right now (but if that cup were half-full of carlsberg i might think differently)... the only bad thing about copenhagen thus far is the ever-fickle weather and the fact that everything is effing expensive (i.e. cell phone- $200; bike (used)-$300; bottle of o.j.- $5): sweet baby james! i decided to escape the city by aimlessly biking throughout copenhagen- i stopped at a river and saw a ton of swans just chillin' there.. it was so amazigng.. this city is so clean and accessible, it's unbelievable.. bikes are actually given the right-of-way, and cyclists actually signal that they are going to turn: even the kiddies do!

well, i intend to post pics and drunken stories just as soon as i have some worth reading... until then, miss you all very much! enjoy the sunshine and familairity!